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1. 

   Colonel Large Cock
   Member

   Dear Lies,
   unfortunately no one can be "just like" The Colonel. Even as a chick I exuded charisma and charm, and when you add to that a 20inch chicken log, you have the perfect package! No pun intended. However, The Colonel feels if you can "turn" a lesbian you will be on your way to Colonel like behavior. The road ahead will be long and arduous, but when things get difficult remember the Colonels' words, "Use the Cock my son" CLC

   http://twitter.com/ColoneLargeKok

   Posted 11 months ago #
2. 

   Colonel Large Cock
   Member

   Dear Jessie,
   the question of whether to manscape or not is a difficult one. I believe the best option is to remove all your hair. This can be achieved with a small dose of radiation. Sure, you will have significantly reduced you lifespan, but at least you'll be hairless! "But what if the woman likes a man with some hair?" I hear you say. Get to know the proprieter of your local beauty salon. The pubic hair from bikini waxings can be fashioned into merkins of different lengths, depending on the womans' preference. CLC
   As The Colonel says, "I like snatching kisses, and vice versa"

   Posted 11 months ago #
3. 

   AnotherA
   Member

   Olivia no! I had such a huge bet going with CLC, on you posting in this thread Gonna take me the rest of '09 to pay him whats owed.
   Dear CLC,
   Fuck you, the first case of beer is on its way. Enjoy it you magnificent feathered bastard.
   Happily surprised,
   Andy

   I've got a good feeling about you.

   Posted 11 months ago #
4. 

   Michelle (stompthewalrus)
   Member

   *whistles absently, taps foot*

   http://twitter.com/stompthewalrus

   Posted 11 months ago #
5. 

   AnotherA
   Member

   Ask your question michelle! The cock knows all.

   Posted 11 months ago #
6. 

   Terrence Cheek
   Member

   Dear Colnel I come to you today lost and confused. I posted in a thread that I"m as proud as dad that just has bought his 13year old son a hooker. Am I wrong for saying that as men when we turn 13years old that we want to explore inside a womens love cave? Am I wrong for feeling this way and am I wrong for saying it in public? O wise an sage one this guild member needs your sage advice? An if you say I was wrong for saying and thinking this, I will appologize to Rollie Dingo for going postal on his ass.

   Twitter

   Posted 11 months ago #
7. 

   liesforliars
   Member

   @clc Ah, then I believe I'm on my way. Any other advice will be fully appreciated CLC

   Food tastes so much better when its punched into your face
   http://www.twitter.com/liesforliars

   Posted 11 months ago #
8. 

   Colonel Large Cock
   Member

   Dear Terrence,
   The Colonel likes bangin' chicks as much as the next Rooster, but he keeps it legal! I see you have already apologised, and the Colonel congratulates you for this! Now let's put this whole thing behind us and go bang some hot chicks! CLC

   Posted 11 months ago #
9. 

   Grassy Grassy
   Member

   Dear Colonel Cockhearts.... my place at 10? Wear that fishnet thing.

   Posted 11 months ago #
10. 

    Riverside216
    Member

    I'll bring the video camera, and a latex mask.

    http://gamezandtech.blogspot.com/
    http://twitter.com/ahachmi

    Posted 11 months ago #
11. 

    Terrence Cheek
    Member

    Thanks Colnel you are King bro.

    Posted 11 months ago #
12. 

    Riverside216
    Member

    Hey Colonel I'm following you on Twitter, so do not ignore me.

    Posted 11 months ago #
13. 

    Usmcjamal
    Member

    Dear CLC,

    I want to know everything you know.Pass down your knowledge to me
    I'll be like chickenhawk lol

    Posted 11 months ago #
14. 

    Usmcjamal
    Member

    @ CLC

    Im 18 but I work with 21-23 year old college girls. they looovee me and think im adorable but I dont l know if its in a little brother way or in a "i mite have a chance way".
    they are all gorgeous lol.... confidence is not an issue for me they even watch me get girls numbers lol . my question is how can I have a chance with one of these girls????

    Posted 11 months ago #
15. 

    Colonel Large Cock
    Member

    Dear Jamal,
    The Colonel hopes you aren't comparing him to Foghorn Leghorn! He, quite frankly, is a fuckwit! You do realise Henery Hawk is trying to catch Foghorn, and therefore your comparison is incorrect. Nonetheless, The Colonel will help you. It's a known fact that most attractive women aren't too bright. (Lady Munn is an exception of course) Start with the blonde one first. Tell her you are a virgin and you're scared about "doing it" for the first time, and that you've always had a crush on her. Never underestimate the power of a "sympathy shag" If she rejects you, try the next one! If this fails, buy yourself a video camera and tell them you're filming some sort of "Girls Gone Wild" piece. Some women will do anything if they think they'll be famous. The Colonel also suggests you paint your walls, it's very unseemly. CLC
    As The Colonel says, "I'm the Gallus with the Large Phallus"

    Posted 11 months ago #
16. 

    cobranatashaah
    Member

    dear clc,
    I think I have a problem and this is a two part question if that's ok
    .A- I like girls, is this normal seeing that I am a girl?
    B- how can I convince a girl who's straight to get in be with me?
    thank you in advance,
    jen!

    COBRALALALALALALALALALALA!
    currently online on olivia munn fan chat http://www.meebo.com/room/oliviamunnchat

    Posted 11 months ago #
17. 

    buddha
    Member

    What is the appropriate behavior for a man or a woman in the midst of this world, where each person is clinging to his piece of debris? What's the proper salutation between people as they pass each other in this flood?

    The thought manifests as the word. The word manifests as the deed. The deed develops into habit. And the habit hardens into character. So watch the thought and its ways with care. And let it spring from love, born out of concern for all beings.

    Posted 11 months ago #
18. 

    Michelle (stompthewalrus)
    Member

    Get a straight girl into bed by planting seeds of doubt into her head. That's how I do it.

    Posted 11 months ago #
19. 

    Riverside216
    Member

    @Michelle, so that is how they do it,
    I wonder if it will work for threesomes as well...

    Posted 11 months ago #
20. 

    noname
    Member

    Dear CLC,

    Can i be lieutenant large cock?

    http://www.twitter.com/benjiisan

    Posted 11 months ago #
21. 

    Michelle (stompthewalrus)
    Member

    If you're the kind of guy who wants a threesome, you're not the kind of guy who will ever get to have a threesome.

    Posted 11 months ago #
22. 

    Riverside216
    Member

    @Michelle, I know, but I really do not get the whole threesome ideal that men get, but maybe I'm not old enough to know.

    Posted 11 months ago #
23. 

    noname
    Member

    @ michelle

    That's prolly not true. If i really absolutely wanted a threesome, i would walk into an insane asylum and just ask.

    All that to say that i support threesomes, never.

    Posted 11 months ago #
24. 

    liesforliars
    Member

    Threesomes? Master how to pleasure ONE first. Then move on to two if you must.

    Posted 11 months ago #
25. 

    Colonel Large Cock
    Member

    Dear Jen,
    Of course it's normal for you to like girls. That's because you've never been with The Colonel! I have converted many lesbians over my time, but I digress. Invite her over for a few drinks, put on some K.D.Lang, then engage her in some general chit chat. Then, when she seems relaxed, accidently spill a drink on her, so she has to change her clothes. When she comes back you should already be sitting there naked wearing a strap on! This may shock her at first, but I'm sure you can talk her around. Just tell her to pretend she's being banged by a guy, if that helps.
    The Colonel takes his profession seriously, and therefore would appreciate it if you could provide video documentation for his very important research. CLC
    As the Colonel says,"There's no such thing as a lesbian, only a woman that hasn't been with The Colonel"

    Posted 11 months ago #
26. 

    noname
    Member

    Yes video documentation is crucial.

    Posted 11 months ago #
27. 

    cobranatashaah
    Member

    LMAO ! will try that on a fellow co-worker on thank you for your help and your time... lol i'll be sure to post it on you tube as well....
    and michelle thats how i got sucked in!

    Posted 11 months ago #
28. 

    Riverside216
    Member

    I will be sure to sell the DvD extras at a church fundraiser

    Haha, I do not even go to church tbh

    Posted 11 months ago #
29. 

    Colonel Large Cock
    Member

    Dear noname,
    The Colonel has considered the possibility of taking on an apprentice. Unfortunately your hairdo precludes you from this. CLC

    Posted 11 months ago #
30. 

    Riverside216
    Member

    I will go under your cock wing CLC, may the kok ebb and flow with you young ones.

    Posted 11 months ago #

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